Living without Danger
Chapter 24: Halloween (Year 2)
By Anne B. Walsh
Chapter 24: Halloween
Ginny was on her way to Potions when she heard someone call her name.
"Ginny! Got a second?"
Dudley Dursley was running across the Great Hall, grinning. "I just wanted to say thank you," he said. "I did what you suggested — talked to Professor Snape — and it worked! Nott and Crabbe and Goyle all got detentions, and they had to pay for my broomstick to get fixed!"
"That’s wonderful," said Ginny, smiling at him.
"And that’s not all — I’m on the team! I’m a reserve Beater for Slytherin!"
"Congratulations." Ginny shook his hand. "Just don’t hit any Bludgers too hard at Ron, all right? He’s nervous enough when he plays."
"I won’t. Thank you so much. If there’s ever anything I can do for you..."
Ginny nodded. "I’ll remember."
xXxXx
A few days later, the Pride was sitting outdoors after lunch, reading and chatting. Harry was discussing their Defense lessons with Ginny, comparing the first year curriculum to the second, when she looked across the courtyard and frowned.
"What’s wrong?"
She pointed. Dudley Dursley was on the other side of the courtyard, saying something to Percy, who was looking very prefectish and stern. Harry and Ginny got up and moved closer.
"...supposed to know I was disturbing you? It’s break! We’re allowed to laugh!"
"I don’t like your attitude, Dursley. I’ll have that book."
"But it’s mine!"
"And you were reading it in a disruptive manner. Hand it over."
Dursley looked sulky, but produced a small book from within his cloak and gave it to Percy.
"You can have it back by applying through your Head of House," said Percy, tucking the book away inside his own cloak. "Kindly conduct yourself in a more appropriate fashion in the future."
He turned and walked away.
Dursley looked at Harry and Ginny. "I was laughing too loud at what I was reading," he said, shrugging. "I thought the whole point of break was to let it out, do what you’re not supposed to do in class, like make loud noises and laugh."
"It is," Harry said, watching Percy go. "He’s just being a prat — sorry, Ginny."
"Don’t apologize, it’s true." Ginny turned to Dursley. "Sorry about him. He’s always been a bit like this."
"And you have to live in the same house with him? You have my sympathies."
"Thanks." Ginny smiled. "How’s Quidditch coming?"
"All right. It’s a lot harder than I thought to hit the Bludger hard enough without falling off my broom..."
They discussed the fine points of playing the various positions until the bell rang for afternoon classes.
"You know, he’s really not so bad," said Harry as they made their way indoors.
xXxXx
Wood got into a bit of a spat with Slytherin Quidditch Captain Marcus Flint over practice times near the end of September, but Madam Pomfrey and Meghan were able to remove the tentacles, and the four Heads of House worked out a schedule for their respective teams to use the pitch. No one was entirely happy with it, which meant it was a perfect compromise.
Meghan, on the other hand, was happier than anyone had ever seen her. What had begun as a way to keep her out of everyone’s hair was fast becoming an indispensable part of her life. Madam Pomfrey was heard to say, as October arrived and students began coming down with colds, that she didn’t know how she’d coped without the girl.
Overall, life was good for Pack and Pride. Letters from Remus and Danger arrived often, narrating tales of life at home without everyone, and the Hogwarts contingent made sure to keep them updated on all the funny little things that happened.
Such as the incident of the 14th of October.
xXxXx
Sirius was just coming out of his office when he heard giggling down the hall.
I know that laugh.
As he watched, all eight of the Pride scuttled past the intersection of the halls he could see. Only Harry, bringing up the rear, thought to look both ways, and his face turned an odd shade of green as he caught sight of Sirius.
Sirius walked quickly over to him. "Do I want to know?" he asked.
Harry shook his head.
"Then I never saw you." Sirius turned around and listened to Harry’s footsteps retreating down the hall, climbing another set of stairs, finally echoing into nothingness.
I wonder what they pulled this time.
He descended the marble staircase into the entrance hall, intending to visit the kitchens and grab something to eat. Dinner wasn’t for another two hours, after all.
"Black!"
He turned. "Snape," he said as politely as he could manage.
The Potions Master’s greasy face was twisted with rage. "Where are your children?"
"I have no idea. Why?"
"Do you know what they have done?"
"Do you mean recently, or in general?"
Snape fumed for a moment, then regained control of himself. "I demand to know where they are."
"And I’ve already told you, I don’t know."
"A degradation of the most infamous kind... they will not get away with this, not even you will shelter them from it..." Snape was pacing around a small section of the hall, fists clenched.
"What did you catch them doing?"
"I caught them doing nothing. I returned to my office to find it already accomplished."
"Then how do you know it was them?"
"Because," said Snape in a poisonous tone, "no one else in this castle would have the audacity to fill my best cauldron with liquefied slugs!"
xXxXx
Upstairs, there was extreme merriment.
"I don’t see what’s so funny," said the permanent occupant of the Pride’s hiding place in injured tones.
"Sorry, Myrtle," said Ron, wiping his eyes. "But you never had Snape in class. You don’t know how possessive he is about his cauldrons."
"Treats them like precious jewels," said Draco, leaning against one of the walls and catching his breath.
"And that potion you made was brilliant, Hermione," said Harry. "Looks just like slugs put through a blender."
"Thanks." Hermione blushed a little.
"We ought to catch a Gragblatter in the forest and let it go in his office," said Luna. "They like to drink potions. It would probably drink up all the ones he keeps in there before he got back."
Neville shook his head. "Not yet," he said. "Not for a while. We’d better lay off until he cools down about this."
"But it was brilliant, wasn’t it?" said Meghan, going into a fresh wave of giggles. "When he screamed like that?"
"We were lucky he didn’t catch us," said Hermione. "We just barely got out of there in time — good thinking to watch the door, Neville, he would have caught us for sure if you hadn’t warned us."
Neville smiled. "Thanks, Hermione."
"We’d better wash the cauldron out," said Ginny, drawing her wand. "So they don’t have any evidence against us. Scourgify!"
Pink soap bubbles appeared within the encrusted cauldron Hermione had used to brew the potion they’d left for Snape, but it did not become magically clean. Ginny frowned. "I need some help," she said.
Luna drew her own wand. "Scourgificus Maximus," she said.
The mess within the cauldron rocketed out and plastered itself all over the walls, leaving the cauldron sparkling clean but the rest of the bathroom, and its occupants, covered in potion remnants.
"Oops," said Luna unconcernedly, looking around.
Moaning Myrtle, floating above her usual stall, giggled.
Hermione and Ginny, working together, managed to get most of the mess cleared up, and the Pride slipped out of the bathroom by twos and threes, so as not to be seen. Harry, Ron, and Hermione went last, and Ron was just shutting the door when a voice made all three of them jump nearly a foot.
"RON!"
"Oh, hell," said Ron under his breath.
"What in the name of Merlin were you doing in a girls’ bathroom?" demanded Percy, staring at them from the top of the nearby staircase.
"Er, well, I really had to go," said Ron weakly. "And I didn’t see any boys’ ones around."
Harry nodded hard. Hermione seemed to be fighting off an attack of nervous giggles.
Percy scowled at them. "Five points from Gryffindor," he said, "and don’t let me catch you here again." The light glinted on his glasses and prefect badge as he marched away.
Ron’s ears were red. "That’s right," he muttered as they walked down the hall, "we’ll just see how shiny that badge is when I stick it up your—"
"Ron!"
xXxXx
Snape was unable to pin the incident on anyone, and thus punished all of Gryffindor House by taking massive amounts of points during their Potions lessons, but no one really minded. The first Quidditch match, in November, would more than make up for it, and a hundred points or so was a small price to pay for the thought of Snape’s face when he saw what was in his best cauldron.
It rained so much in the latter half of October that Professor Sprout shifted the focus of their Herbology lessons to aquatic plants. For one of these lessons, Harry was paired with a curly-haired Hufflepuff boy, who introduced himself as Justin Finch-Fletchley. "I’ve seen your friend Neville down here a lot," he said as they carefully clipped off the seed pods on the sea grass they were tending. "He likes this subject, doesn’t he?"
Harry nodded. "He visited my house a few weeks this summer, and he was always out in the back garden with Meghan."
"Meghan? Oh, that’s right, the Professors’ daughter." Justin frowned. "Is it true she sleeps in your dormitory? The girls’ side, I mean, of course?"
"Yes, that’s true."
Justin shook his head. "I don’t think that’s right. She’s not really a student. She should live in her parents’ rooms, or somewhere else altogether. I remember when I was younger, my mum wanted me to go to Harrow, but my dad said the headmaster had a son my age and would always favor him, so he put my name down for Eton instead..."
Harry gave a small nod and checked his watch, relieved to see that there were only a few minutes left in the class.
"So she’s not a student," he said to his Pride as they walked up to the castle, taking advantage of a momentary break in the rain. "So what? What does it hurt to have her here? It’s not like she’s freeloading, she works hard in the hospital wing..."
"She’s always tired when she gets in," contributed Hermione. "And besides, if we didn’t have the Pack, where else could she go? Both her parents are here."
"And they’ve had people in the dorms before who aren’t in the Houses," said Ron. "Guests and such. I know usually they get suites, but if there’s a lot of them, they might get some overflow in the dorms."
Draco nodded. "Dorms aren’t sacred or anything. Besides, Pearl’ll be a Gryffindor in just a couple of years anyway."
"And it’s about to rain again," said Neville, looking up. "Come on, let’s run."
They sprinted for the castle as the skies opened up.
xXxXx
It was generally hard to improve on perfection, but the Halloween feast this year managed. The dancing skeletons Dumbledore had engaged for entertainment were amazing, not only rattling their bones in perfect time with the music but juggling their skulls, tossing them from one to another so fast you could only see a white blur.
"How do they figure out whose is whose afterward?" asked Ron as the skeletons took their bow.
"Don’t know," said Harry as the main courses vanished and puddings appeared. "Pass the treacle tart, Ginny?"
Ginny handed it down the table, shooing away a bat which was swooping towards it, then lifted her goblet. "To a happy Halloween," she said.
"A happy Halloween," echoed the rest of the Pride, lifting their own goblets in answer.
"And no trolls," added Hermione, making everyone laugh.
Harry took a bite of his tart, then paused. "Siss?" he said doubtfully.
"Sorry?" said Draco.
"Nothing." Harry swallowed and listened hard. He’d been almost sure he’d heard his friend’s voice...
And then he heard it again.
"... prey... must find prey..."
Harry was on his feet, moving toward the exit of the Great Hall. How did she get that hungry without me noticing? I have to find her, get her something to eat before she goes and bites someone and gets us both in trouble...
"Where are you going?" asked Hermione’s voice from a little behind him, sounding breathless as she jogged to keep up with him.
"I have to find Siss. Something’s wrong with her."
"So hungry... for so long..."
Harry shook his head, still moving. I could have sworn I got her a mouse last week. Maybe she’s been more active recently...
He was on the first floor now, at the top of the marble staircase, but he still wasn’t level with the voice, which kept moving up.
She’s in a hurry. Must think I’m in my dorm. I’d call to her, but someone might hear me... no, what am I thinking of? Everyone’s at the feast, no one’s going to know...
"Siss! Wait for me!"
"That’s scary, Harry," said Neville from behind him.
"That rhymed," said Meghan.
"Shh," said Harry to both of them, straining his ears.
"Food..." said the voice in tones of satisfaction. "Food at last..."
"Siss, whatever you’re thinking of eating, don’t!" Harry yelled, taking the stairs two at a time. With my luck, she’s found a mouse someone transfigured from a toy one and it’s going to change back in her stomach and hurt her...
"Harryyyyyy!"
The scream put new wings on his feet as he hurtled down the hallways of the second floor. He stopped suddenly as he turned the last corner. A torch high on the wall sputtered, but gave enough light for him to see what was lying on the floor.
Siss, on her side, unmoving and limp.
He was on his knees beside her, picking her up. "Siss, wake up. I’m here."
The snake did not respond.
"Siss, say something. Please. You’re scaring me... if this is a joke, it isn’t funny..."
Nothing. The body in his hands remained as lifeless as if it were made of rubber. The eyes, always so lively, were glazed over, unfocused. Not even a tremor of breath moved her.
"No." Harry shook his head, cradling Siss against him like a baby. "No. Siss, you have to wake up. You have to. Please, wake up. Please..."
He was blinking away tears, and wondered when he’d started crying.
"Please don’t be dead..."
All she needed was to get warm. He’d hold her against his body to warm her up. Against his chest would be the best place — she could have his body heat, and the heat from his pendants as well...
xXxXx
Aletha hadn’t been too worried when the entire Pride suddenly got up and left the Great Hall, Harry in the lead. They had probably just remembered that they had to get a prank ready for someone.
She smiled. Liquefied slugs, indeed...
A few moments later, her pendants heated up.
Now I think I need to worry.
"Harry," said Sirius, having pulled his chain from his robes before she could and identified the person whose distress was being signaled. "Come on, we’d better find him."
They pushed back their chairs and rose. Dumbledore looked down the table at them, and Sirius tapped his chest significantly. The Headmaster nodded and sat back.
"What could be upsetting Harry this much?" Aletha asked quietly as they left the Great Hall.
"Don’t know. He might have taken a bad fall and gotten hurt somehow... in which case, someone will be coming to get us any minute..."
Footsteps pounded along the gallery which led to the marble staircase from the first floor.
"Right on schedule," said Aletha, looking up.
Percy Weasley dashed into sight, looking somewhat frazzled and very relieved to see them. "Professors, thank heaven — can you come right away? It’s Harry, he’s on the second floor, and there’s writing on the wall, it says the most incredible thing..."
"What’s happened to Harry?" asked Aletha, running up the stairs and following Percy down the hall.
"It’s his snake, Professor. I think it’s dead."
"Oh, no," Aletha breathed. Siss was so much more than a pet to Harry — she was a friend, perhaps even a mother figure...
"Oh, yes," said Sirius darkly, pointing up ahead.
Someone was crying, and the pain in his voice quickened Aletha’s feet even more on the second staircase. The unthinkable had happened to this person, the world had fallen in on him...
Harry was on his knees, folded over on himself, alternating broken sobs with full-out howls of grief. Hermione and Meghan knelt one on either side of him, trying to comfort him with their mere presence. The rest of his friends were hovering around, obviously unsure of what to do. Draco looked up with great relief as Aletha and Sirius came into sight.
"Is it Siss?" Aletha asked him.
Draco nodded. "I don’t know what he’s saying, though," he said. "It’s all in Parseltongue."
Harry’s sobs had indeed now given way to a torrent of hissing speech, and although Aletha couldn’t understand the words, she’d heard that tone in enough voices to know what was being said.
You can’t be dead. I love you. I need you. You can’t be dead...
She knelt down in front of Harry and laid a hand on his shoulder, getting no response from him at all.
"I don’t think he even knows we’re here," said Meghan. She glanced at the limp snake in Harry’s hands and sniffled slightly. "Why did she die?"
"I don’t know, little love. But we will find out." Aletha’s eyes traveled from her daughter’s face to the wall behind her, and suddenly she recalled what Percy had said in the entrance hall.
"...writing on the wall... it says the most incredible thing..."
It certainly does.
She stood up and backed away a few paces, so that she could read the entire message. Sirius obviously already had; his face was grimly set.
THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS HAS BEEN OPENED. ENEMIES OF THE HEIR, BEWARE.
Aletha sighed. Why can’t we just have a normal life?
"Do you want to deal with Harry, or with this?" she asked Sirius, waving at the wall.
"I’ll take Harry. Back to our quarters, I think. He ought to be alone for a little while. Well, not alone exactly, but not with a lot of people who didn’t know about him and Siss."
"We’ll come," said Ron. "If we’re allowed."
Sirius nodded. "Certainly." He drew his wand and touched it gently to the top of Harry’s head. "Consopio," he said.
Harry slumped where he was, his sobs stopping abruptly. Sirius caught him, and Ron and Draco hurried over to help Sirius get Harry into his arms. Draco helped Hermione up afterwards, and Meghan got up and went over to Neville, who patted her shoulder awkwardly, then almost timidly put an arm around her when she leaned into him. The Pride followed Sirius as he carried Harry towards the stairs, which would take him to their office and quarters.
A distant rumble alerted Aletha that the feast must be over, and there would be people in the hallway in a few moments. She looked at Percy, who had been watching everything silently. "I’ll need your help to keep them under control," she said. "The last thing we need is panic."
"Yes, ma’am."
Prefect and professor turned to face the incoming crowds.
xXxXx
Harry began to stir before they reached the office, which suited Sirius fine. He’d used only the lightest possible Sleeping Spell, just enough to keep Harry quiescent until he could get his godson to somewhere private. Harry needed to grieve. Putting it off would only make it worse.
Odd to think of it with James and Lily, but this is the first time that someone he’s actually known has ever died...
And that was a good question Meghan asked. How did she die? There’s no marks on her that I can see, and what would have attacked her in the school anyway?
And it can’t be a coincidence that she was lying under that message. I don’t like this.
"Siss," Harry mumbled, as Draco opened the door of the office for Sirius. "Siss, wake up."
Sirius sighed, lowering Harry to the couch and drawing his wand. "Come on in," he told the rest of the Pride. "And shut the door behind you." He opened the door to his and Aletha’s quarters and started conjuring cushions on the floor of the living area, adding a few sheets to one side for good measure.
"Do you want us to den with him?" asked Draco, coming up beside Sirius.
"Yes. Don’t push him to do anything he doesn’t want to, just get comfortable and stay with him. Don’t let him leave, and don’t any of you leave either. Bathroom’s down the hall to the right if any of you need it." Sirius put his wand away.
Draco nodded and went over to Ginny and Luna, speaking to them in a low tone.
Sirius approached Harry, who was sitting up now, rubbing his eyes and looking confused. "How’d I get here?" he asked as Sirius sat down beside him on the couch.
"I brought you. You’re going to den in here tonight, I think."
"All right." Harry looked down at what he was holding, and Sirius saw his shoulders stiffen. "Siss..." He held the snake against him, his eyes filling with tears again. "Padfoot, she’s dead!"
Sirius nodded slowly, wishing he didn’t have to, that he could tell Harry it was all a mistake and erase the pain and grief in his godson’s eyes. But he knew he couldn’t.
All we can do is try to help him get through it.
Harry let out another sob, but he seemed to have worn himself out in the hallway. He was still crying, certainly, but it was quieter and calmer, if any kind of crying could be described as calm. The rest of the Pride was in the living area now, setting up the den, Sirius saw, leaving him and Harry alone for a few moments.
He had seldom felt so helpless. It wasn’t a feeling he liked.
But at least I’m here. That has to count for something.
Harry was just wiping his eyes with Sirius’ handkerchief when someone knocked at the outer door of the office.
"Who is it?" Sirius said quietly, knowing the charms on the door would carry his voice out.
"It is I," answered Dumbledore’s voice.
"Just a moment." Sirius looked down at Harry. "I need to ask you something hard, Greeneyes," he said.
"What?"
"I need to see Siss. We need to examine her, to try to find out how she died. We won’t..." Sirius stopped before saying, hurt her. "We’ll be careful," he finished instead.
Slowly, Harry opened his left hand, exposing the limp body of the snake. "She never hurt anyone," he said stiffly. "She never did anything wrong."
"I know." Sirius knew there were a million other things he could say, but his instincts were warning him to keep his mouth shut. "I know."
Harry’s throat worked once as he stared at his dead friend. Then he tilted his hand, letting her body slide onto Sirius’ palm. Without speaking, he got up and walked into the other room, and Meghan shut the door behind him.
Sirius laid the snake gently on his desk, then went to open the door.
As he had expected, Dumbledore wasn’t alone. Aletha was with him, of course, but so was Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape, and Remus and Danger, Danger still brushing ashes out of her hair. Of course, their pendants would have activated as well...
"Where are they?" asked Minerva, looking around the office.
"Back in there," Sirius said, nodding towards the back of the room as everyone filed in. "Do you think someone should stay with them?"
"I can go," said Danger. "I’m unlikely to be much help out here." She crossed the office and slipped quietly through the door. "Shoes off, everyone," Sirius heard her say before the door was closed again.
"Will he be all right?" asked Dumbledore quietly.
"I think so," said Sirius. "It was just a shock — first person he’s ever known who’s died..."
Dumbledore nodded. "And to him, she would indeed be a person, due to his gift."
"Gift?" asked Snape sharply.
Damn it, that’s right, he doesn’t know...
"Harry’s a Parselmouth," said Aletha. "We don’t know why, or how. We assume it has something to do with Voldemort, but there’s no real way to tell. And it’s beside the point in any case."
Sirius and Remus exchanged a small smile. Hearing Aletha shut someone down was always a treat. For that someone to be Snape, instead of one of them, was very enjoyable indeed.
But as she’d said, that was beside the point today. The point was, who, or what, had killed Harry’s pet snake?
And how could they make sure it didn’t happen again?
xXxXx
Harry felt numb, as if all his ability to feel had flowed out of him with his tears. His head was resting in Danger’s lap, and her arm was across him, holding one of his hands, but it didn’t make him feel any better. Ron and Draco were playing a game of chess, while Hermione was reading aloud to everyone else. Glances kept flicking towards him, but where this would normally have annoyed Harry to the point of shouting, tonight he didn’t care.
Something thin and gold intruded on his vision. He rolled onto his back and looked up. Danger had lengthened her pendant chain and was holding it out to him in an obvious invitation.
Harry didn’t really want to talk, but it was easier to take the chain than to say no. He accepted it and slid it over his head, deciding that he would ignore anything that Danger had to say. It wouldn’t change anything, anyway.
But the first thing that came across the link between them wasn’t spoken. It was an emotion, or a mix of emotions. Love was there, the strong, fierce love of a mother for her cub, but there was also grief and sorrow and pain and confusion and anger. Everything Harry had felt since he had realized Siss was dead, Danger had felt as well.
When? he asked, spurred into curiosity despite himself.
When my parents died.
Feeling flooded back into Harry, a feeling of shame. Here he was, making a huge fuss over a pet snake, when Danger had lost both her parents in one day...
Oh, damn, that was not what I meant, said Danger, her shoulders sagging. I’m not trying to downplay your loss, Greeneyes. Siss meant a lot to you. What I’m trying to say is that I know what it feels like to lose someone without any warning, someone you’ve always counted on to be there. Because they always were. Until one day suddenly they’re not.
Harry looked up at her through a haze of tears. You do understand, then.
Yes, I do. And I know that doesn’t make it one bit easier to take. Nothing will, for a little while. But you don’t have to do this alone. She bent and brushed her lips against his cheek. Remember that. You’re not alone.
Harry turned over, pulled his glasses off, buried his face in her shirt, and began once more to cry. You’re wrong, he said through the link. It does make it easier. A little bit.
Then I’m glad. For your sake.
Danger’s arms were anchoring him, keeping him from floating away on the ocean of tears he was crying. They were the only real things in the world besides his grief. He was thankful they were there.
Later, when he had cried himself out for the moment, he was thankful for other things being there. Like the rest of the Pride. Ron’s winning strategy against Draco, and the story Hermione was reading, gave him something to think about rather than how Siss had looked as she lay on the cold stone floor. He even managed to drink a little of the hot chocolate the house-elves brought them before they changed into their pajamas (brought down from their dormitories) and found places to curl up in the den they’d built.
Meghan cuddled up against him and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you," she whispered.
Harry scent-touched her, then let his eyes close, surrendering to the tiredness.
His last coherent thought was to hope he didn’t dream.
xXxXx
"You put the potion in his chocolate, didn’t you?" asked Remus.
Aletha nodded. "Dreamless Sleep. He needs it."
Sirius sighed. "I might steal a bit of that for myself." They’d examined Siss’ body scrupulously, and all they could determine was that she was dead. There were no marks on her, no signs that she’d eaten anything that poisoned her — it was almost as if she’d died by the Killing Curse, but who would bother to use Avada Kedavra on a common garden snake?
"Is it possible she died of natural causes?" asked Danger. They were alone in the office, the other teachers having excused themselves when it had become clear that they would learn little, if anything, from examining Siss. The snake’s body now reposed on Sirius’ desk, in a small wooden box Dumbledore had conjured for it. "Harry never said anything to me about how old she was, but he knew her in London — they met when he was four. So that makes her at least eight or nine. I don’t know how old that is for a snake..."
"But what would bring Harry running out of the Hall to exactly where she was? And what about that writing on the wall?" Remus shook his head. "There’s something going on here we don’t understand. And I’m not about to wake him up and ask him, so it has to wait until morning or later. Would you happen to have a guest bedroom around here somewhere? The closer we stay at the moment, the better, I think."
"Across from ours," said Aletha. "I’ll show you."
"Show me," said Danger, standing up. "We can let the boys talk."
"Boys indeed." Remus pinched her gently, making her squeak a little. "There are boys back in there, my dear. I am a man."
"That’s what you say." Danger slipped quickly through the door, followed by Aletha, who shut it quietly to avoid disturbing the sleeping children.
"Sassy woman you married, Moony."
"Don’t I know it." Remus leaned back in his chair. "It’s funny how none of them made a fuss about denning. I would have expected Ron or Neville to be a little more reserved about it. It’s not the sort of thing most people do."
Sirius snorted. "Please. And swearing blood oaths in the dead of night, then getting dragged off in dreams to become Heirs of the Houses of Hogwarts is?"
"Point taken. But I’m still struck by how very efficiently they set up den. As if they’ve done it before."
"You think they have?"
"I think it’s a possibility."
"But where? There isn’t anywhere in Gryffindor Tower they could do it. Think about it, Moony. They’d need a private place, one they could all get to, but not one other people could easily find. Where is there in the Tower that fits that description?"
"Once again, point taken. Maybe I’m just seeing things that aren’t there."
"Mr. Padfoot would like to submit that Mr. Moony often sees things which aren’t there."
"Mr. Moony would like to remind Mr. Padfoot of the night he insisted there were blue bowtruckles dancing on the banisters."
"Mr. Padfoot would rather not be reminded of that."
"Mr. Moony knows that." Remus looked very smug.
xXxXx
Harry woke up the next morning fully cognizant of what had happened the night before and where he was. Meghan was still breathing softly beside him as he sat up carefully and looked around for his glasses. Finally he spotted them, across the room on an end table.
Siss is dead.
He stepped carefully between his sleeping friends and picked up his glasses, putting them on.
Siss is dead. She died last night.
The room came into clearer focus. His Pride was sprawled every which way on the floor. Harry smiled a little to see Draco and Luna, asleep next to each other, their hands just touching.
Siss is dead. I’ll never see her again.
He sat down on the couch and tried to make sense of the feelings warring inside him. He felt horribly sad, of course, but that wasn’t the only thing in his heart. He was also happy to see all his friends here, grateful that they had stayed with him, worried because he hadn’t had a chance to finish his homework, even hungry for his breakfast. Was he bad because he didn’t care enough about Siss for her to be the only thing on his mind?
A sound made him look up. Letha was standing in the entrance to the hall that led to the bedrooms and bathroom, watching him. "Good morning," she said very quietly.
"Good morning." Harry tried to smile, but it was hard.
"Come sit with me?" Letha indicated the office door.
Harry nodded and made his way across the room and out into the office, where he sat down on the couch and pulled his feet up under him. Letha sat next to him, sliding an arm around his shoulders, and he leaned on her, his nose filling with the scent that always seemed to hover around her, clean laundry and a sharp, fresh, herbal smell, rosemary, he thought. He could ask Neville sometime.
"How are you feeling?"
"I don’t know."
"Complicated?"
"Yes."
"I’m willing to listen, if you’re willing to talk."
Harry began, haltingly, to explain how he felt, how he was still terribly sad about Siss, but how it wasn’t the only thing he was feeling, and how he felt bad about that, and wondered if he was a bad person for it...
"No," said Letha decisively, cutting him off. "I’ll tell you that right now. You are not a bad person. There is no set standard for grief, Harry. No one is going to say, ‘No, you haven’t cried enough,’ or ‘You don’t feel sufficiently bad,’ or at least no one should. No one has that right. You will do your grieving in your own way and your own time, as we all must. Do you understand?"
Harry nodded. "I think so." He looked up at her. "Thanks."
"You’re welcome." Letha kissed his forehead, and held him as he cried his first tears of the day.
xXxXx
It was a quiet Sunday. Pack and Pride mostly stayed where they were, going out for a few minutes at a time to get things they needed, then returning to the Defense teachers’ office. They never left Harry completely alone, but nobody pushed him to do more than he wanted to. If he joined in a game, he was welcomed; if not, they let him be.
He did his share of crying, but quietly, and more or less privately, as no one tried to intrude on him. If he wanted comfort, all he had to do was ask, aloud or with his eyes, and one of the girls, or his Pack-parents, would hold him, or one of the other boys sit next to him, silent reminders that although one person he’d loved was gone, he hadn’t been abandoned.
After dinner that night, Pack and Pride gathered outdoors, near the edge of the Forest, where a small hole was waiting. Harry knelt down and laid Siss’ coffin in it, with hands that only shook a little bit.
"She was my friend," he said, still kneeling. "She told me things I needed to hear. And I’ll never forget her."
He crumbled one piece of dirt over the coffin, then began to scoop the rest of it on in handfuls. The girls were crying, he could hear them, and he’d seen a glint in Ron’s blue eyes before he’d knelt down. The familiar pressure was building in his own throat as well, but he had to finish this before he could cry...
Suddenly he wasn’t alone. Draco was kneeling beside him, helping him bury Siss, and Neville on his other side, with something in his hands. A flower, Harry saw, it was a flower in a pot, and he was placing it in the small circular hole Harry had noticed above the grave and wondered at, and as he looked up he realized the only reason Ron wasn’t helping him as well was because he was holding Ginny, and Moony was holding Hermione, and Padfoot Meghan, and Danger and Letha were holding each other, all of them crying...
Luna had something in her hands, something that glinted silver. Harry wiped his eyes on his sleeve and saw that it was Draco’s flute, and his throat squeezed even a little more as his brother put one final handful of dirt on the grave, then stood up, leaving Harry to finish it himself, and brushed off his hands before taking his instrument from Luna. Neville stood up too, having finished with the flower, and Harry was the only one left kneeling as Draco began to play.
The piece was a lament, a sorrowing over one who was gone, but there was beauty in this sorrow, and peace to be found at the end of it, and a promise that life would go on. Nothing would ever be the same, but grief would not always be the first thing in the morning and the last at night. In time, it would be the happiness and laughter which would be remembered, instead of the sadness and pain.
Harry stayed where he was for what felt like a long time after the last note died away. Then he got up and went back to the castle with his family and friends.
He needed to get to bed. He had class in the morning.