Vivens cum Pericula
Chapter 9: Discovery
By Anne B. Walsh
"I’m going to get a snack," Hermione announced as they walked through the front doors of Camelot.
"Are you," said Peri blandly.
Hermione refrained from taking the third step towards the ice cream shop. "I mean, may I get a snack, please?"
"Yes, you may, but a small one."
"May I too?" Harry asked.
"Can you?" Peri’s tone was serious.
Harry smirked. "I picked Dudley’s pocket."
"You never," Ray said.
Harry nodded. "He took about five kids’ money, and I took it all back when he wasn’t looking and returned it. They clubbed up and gave me 30p each to say thank you. I tried to tell them I didn’t need it, but they wouldn’t leave me alone."
"Is that why he was chasing us today?" Hermione demanded, taking Jump’s lead from Peri. "You could have told me!"
"Hermione, he always chases us anyway. Why does it matter if it’s for something different today?"
"Do you want anything?" Peri asked Ray as Harry and Hermione headed off, still bickering.
"No, I’m not hungry."
"Are you sure?" Peri looked at Ray closely. "You’re not feeling ill, are you?"
"Just a little."
"Come here." Peri laid a wrist on Ray’s forehead. "No temperature," she said critically, "but you’re sweating a bit. Do you want to sit down?"
"Only if I can have a big soft chair."
"A big soft chair. I wonder where we’d find something like that in Camelot." Peri pursed her lips and pretended to look around. "I know. The library!"
Ray was already halfway there.
"I hate it when he runs away before I get to the punchline," Peri grumbled as she started after him.
xXxXx
"Knock, knock."
Remus smiled to himself but didn’t look up. "Who’s there?"
"Banana."
"Banana who? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who?" Remus lifted his head and grinned at the boy standing on the other side of the desk. "Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?"
Ray pouted. "No fair, you knew that one."
"I taught you that one."
"Did not."
"Did so." Remus came around the desk to hug Ray. "How have you been?"
"I’m OK." Ray rose onto his toes. "Look how big I’m getting."
"Down, boy," Remus said, laying a hand on Ray’s pale head and pressing. "You’re tall enough without stretching it."
Ray grumbled under his breath, but came down anyway. "Am I big enough yet?" he asked.
It was the same question he’d been asking ever since he’d realized the nature of the relationship between Remus and Peri. Remus had a sudden flash of a pale-blond child no taller than his waist tugging at his robes, asking gravely if he was big enough for Peri to go away yet.
"Maybe soon now," he answered, using the same words he had that first time and all the times since then.
Ray snorted. "Do you ever mean that?"
"Actually, this time I do." Remus watched the boy meander over to the large armchairs strategically placed between the bookshelves. "You’re getting old enough to take care of yourself."
"Really?" Ray dropped into a chair. "Does that mean I can go away from home?"
Remus sat down on the edge of his desk. "Not until you’re eleven."
"Drat."
Remus chuckled. "You knew that. You’re just looking for loopholes."
"Of course I am." Ray tilted his head to one side, attempting to look cute, then winced.
"What’s wrong?"
"Nothing. I fell while we were playing tag and it still hurts a little."
"You fell and hurt your neck?"
Ray shrugged, closing his eyes. "It hurts a little all over. I think I just jarred myself."
Unobtrusively, Remus reached behind him. His fingers found the well-worn button on the desktop that activated the in-house messaging system—one part telephone, one part Floo—to the clinic. The flare of green light in the corner of his eye told him the system was active. "When were you playing tag, Ray?" he asked a little louder than usual.
"A little while ago, when Peri and I went to see Harry and Hermione."
"And how hard did you fall?"
"You worry too much, Moony."
"You noticed," Remus said dryly. "I’d like an answer."
"I lost my breath, I got shaken up, I twisted my ankle. It’s not that bad."
"Why don’t you let me be the judge of that," said Aletha from the door.
Ray’s eyes shot open. "Huh?"
Aletha turned ninety degrees, presenting her profile to Ray. "Good afternoon, Healer Black, how are you?" she said in a piping falsetto, higher than her own voice or Ray’s, then turned back to her original position and spoke in her own voice. "I’m feeling just fine, Ray, thank you for asking, but I understand you’re not feeling your best."
Ray stuck out his tongue.
Aletha’s wand was in her hand faster than Remus’ eye could follow.
"Hlllf!" Ray protested, as best as he could with a tongue which refused to bend.
"Letha, what are you doing to that poor boy?" Peri asked from behind her friend.
"Teaching him a few manners, which you appear to have neglected," Aletha retorted. "What have you been doing with him all these years?"
"You know perfectly well." Peri slipped past Aletha to enter the room. "Ray, were you rude to Healer Black?"
Ray shook his head, glaring at Aletha.
"Apologize anyway."
"Thahee."
Aletha removed the charm. "I was only trying to help," she said with a faint smile. "Enabling him to hold his tongue."
Ray grimaced, swallowing. "Thanks, Healer Black," he said sarcastically. "Now I hurt all over and I have a nasty taste in my mouth."
Peri leveled a look at him. "Draco," she said warningly.
Ray flinched. "Sorry," he mumbled.
"It’s all right," Aletha said, crossing the room and setting her bag on the table in the center of the four armchairs. "Now, do you just ache, or is it some other kind of pain?"
xXxXx
Harry flopped down on one of the benches outside the ice cream shop. "No," he said to Jump, who was eyeing the two cones hopefully. "Mine."
The dog sighed and rested his head on his paws.
"Poor Jump," said Hermione. "He doesn’t get any ice cream. Maybe I should have got it in a cup instead, so he could lick it out."
Harry took care of burgeoning drips and swallowed. "That’s all right," he said. "He can lick my face when I’m done."
"Yuck!" Hermione shuddered. "Harry, he’s got germs!"
"You let him lick your face all the time."
"I do not!"
"You do so. You let him lick you just last night."
"On the cheek. That’s not all over."
"Why do you think I’m going to let him lick my face all over?"
"Why would you have ice cream on your cheek?"
Harry smeared the tip of the ice cream across one side of his face. "That’s why," he said, handing Hermione his cone and leaning down. "Jump! Here, boy!"
Jump sat up and washed Harry’s face enthusiastically. Harry pushed the dog away after a few swipes of the long pink tongue and dried his face on his sleeve.
"You’re disgusting," Hermione said in the general direction of boy and dog.
"You noticed," said Ray, loping up beside them. "What’s good today?"
"I got raspberry chocolate chip," said Hermione. "Harry has banana nut."
"Nuts to nuts, eh?"
"You have to feel better," Harry grumbled, taking a swipe at Ray. The blond boy dodged back out of range, laughing. "You never make stupid jokes when you’re not feeling good."
"So my jokes are better when I’m sick?" Ray darted for the ice cream counter before Harry could answer.
"Yes, he’s better," said Hermione, licking delicately around a chocolate chip. "Healer Black must have found out what was wrong with him."
Jump cocked his head inquiringly.
"No more for you until I’m done," Harry said to the dog, biting off a walnut piece. "I don’t think so, Hermione. What’s really wrong with him is just that he’s him." He grinned. "I don’t think Healer Black can cure that. She’s good, but she’s not that good."
Jump tugged on his leash and whimpered.
"Oh, we never took him out before we left," Hermione said worriedly. "He probably has to use the grass. Do you think they’d mind if we took him out back?"
"We can ask Peri to clean up if he makes a mess," Harry said. "Let’s wait for Ray, then we can all go together."
xXxXx
"Where’s Meghan?" Peri asked Aletha as the adults crossed the concourse.
"She should be here soon. Another girl in her dance class takes the bus home with her mother, and Meghan comes this far with them."
"Mum!" cried a little girl’s voice.
"Speak of the angel," Aletha laughed, turning to face her daughter. "Look who’s here, sweetheart."
"Hi, Peri!" Meghan hugged her mother, then wiggled free to embrace Peri as well. "Is Ray with you?"
"When is he not? He’s out back with Harry and Hermione."
Meghan clapped her hands. "Moony, do you want to see me dance?" she asked, turning to Remus. "We finished learning the dance today. Can I show you?"
"Go ahead," Remus said.
Meghan needed no further encouragement, spinning into a dizzying series of twirls and leaps. When she finished, balancing on one foot with the other extended behind her and her arms held out for balance, all three adults applauded sincerely, as did a few shoppers who’d stopped to watch. Meghan beamed and curtsied to her audience.
"Do you think my daddy would have liked to see me dance?" she asked Remus as the four started towards the clinic.
"I’m sure he would." Remus smiled down at her, the pain of Sirius’ loss lessened by time. He still missed his friend, and always would, but he had grown used to being the only man in his own life.
Not that I wouldn’t change it in an instant if it meant he could come back.
Meghan skipped around the three sedately walking adults, chanting phrases from the songs she heard at dance class. Remus watched her with a pang. "You’d have loved her, Sirius," he said under his breath. "I only wish you could have had the chance."
xXxXx
Out on the grass, three ice creams had been devoured, and running was now the order of the day. The children shouted and chased one another, aware but indifferent to the eyes which watched them.
Watching was all that he could do now, all he had been able to do for a long time. He protected them from the little, mundane troubles of their lives, but what good would he be against something worse? How could he save them from the danger which lay ahead of them?
Harry’s peril went without saying—Voldemort was gone, but not dead, and many of his followers were still at large. Hermione’s was part of the same, since any friend of The Boy Who Lived took a risk, and a Muggleborn girl more than most. Ray was safer in that sense, but in more danger in other ways.
He’s only eight. A sharp eight, but still eight. If Peri quits her job, will he be able to make it to eleven without giving himself away to his father? And what about after he goes to school? Won’t his Sorting tip Lucius off that something’s not quite right?
He growled low in his throat. If I could just have one minute, just one...just long enough to tell them what I know, and what I’ve figured out, and what I’ve seen...
Bellatrix’s mocking voice echoed through his mind. "To change your form is death. To give any sign of recognition that would tell another who you are is death. To communicate with another in any way that a beast would not is death. A beast you chose to become, so a beast now be, for the rest of your unnatural life!"
David and Rose had once discussed what Aletha had done to Bellatrix in hushed whispers, after Hermione was safely in bed. It had given him a great deal of satisfaction.
Hermione herself ran over to him now, laughing, as the boys plunged into the small forest which grew on Camelot property. "Jump is a funny dog, yes he is," she half-sang, scratching his belly. "Jump is a silly dog, yes he is..."
He rolled onto his back, whining with pleasure. The Grangers had been his choice of household because he knew the Dursleys would never accept any dog, let alone a stray, and he’d wanted to be as near to Harry as possible, to keep an eye on the boy.
Besides, Rose is a good cook.
And as much as he’d wanted to go to Aletha, he’d known it was a bad idea. Sooner or later, he wouldn’t have been able to control himself. He’d have tried something, some way to tell her who he was, and then he would have died.
But wouldn’t that be better than this? Cleaner? It would be over, then. I wouldn’t have to play Bella’s stinking game anymore. As it is, I haven’t seen my wife in years, and I’ve never seen my daughter.
But he wasn’t ready to die, not yet. He hadn’t been hurt enough for that. Maybe he’d never seen Meghan, but he knew she existed, and that she was happy. He saw Harry every day, and he’d come to love Hermione as well, and Ray and Peri when he saw them. He’d even seen Remus a few times over the years...
A pair of startled yells and a crashing noise from the trees catapulted him to his feet. His head barely missed Hermione’s as he dashed for the tiny forest.
Please just don’t let them be in trouble that a dog can’t handle, he prayed as he ran. Don’t let it be something that requires magic.
It might be selfish of him, but he still wanted to live.
xXxXx
Peri was laughing at one of Remus’ more outrageous jokes when her amulet seemed to twitch slightly. She shivered.
"Cold?" Aletha asked.
"Not really. I just feel odd. Maybe I should go check on the children."
"Can I come?" Meghan asked. "I want to meet the dog."
"That’s fine with me." Peri took the little girl’s hand and turned to start for the door by which Harry, Hermione, Ray, and Jump had left.
Her chest contracted painfully, and she lost the rhythm of her breathing. Lucius Malfoy stood just inside the door, looking around Camelot distastefully. One cheek was scratched and bleeding, and in his arms he carried an unconscious Ray.
Peri was sure the roaring in her ears was the sound of her world falling apart.
Not again. Not like this. No, please, no...
Malfoy crossed to her, cold anger sharing his face with another emotion Peri couldn’t name, but which looked strangely like satisfaction. "What excellent care you have taken of my son, Miss Grant," he said icily. "What fine companions you have given him, to fit him for his future life. How long exactly has this been going on?"
"Longer than you can possibly imagine," Peri said, moving a little forward and to one side, shielding Meghan with her body. "What’s happened to him?"
"He was climbing in a tree with another boy." Malfoy looked down at his son, who had a bruise spreading across one side of his face. "A dark-haired child with glasses. It was his weight that broke the branch, but both of them paid for it."
"Harry," Aletha breathed.
"Is that who he is? I did wonder." Malfoy nodded negligently over his shoulder. "He’s still out there, probably with the little girl crying over him by now, if she’s finished wailing for her dog."
"What did you do to Jump?" Peri demanded.
"The mongrel attacked me," Malfoy said, satisfaction definitely uppermost on his face now. "I defended myself. If it isn’t dead already, it will be soon."
"You’re horrible!" Meghan screamed, pulling away from Peri and darting around her to confront Malfoy. "I hate you!"
Malfoy’s smile grew slightly as he looked down at the girl. "You sound very like your father," he said lazily. "Did you know that?"
"Meghan, no!" Remus snapped as Meghan drew back her foot. The girl bared her teeth at him, then dashed for the door Malfoy had come in by. Aletha hesitated one anguished moment, then followed her daughter, pausing only to shoot Malfoy a look which should have felled him on the spot.
"You, Miss Grant, are dismissed," Malfoy said to Peri, shifting Ray in his arms. "There will be no reference—in fact, I may see to it that you never work again." He glanced over at Remus. "Perhaps you can find an...unofficial line of work."
"You’ve said what you came to say, and you have what you want," Remus said, stepping up beside Peri. "Leave her alone and take your son home."
Malfoy tutted. "Now, now, I thought this was a place of harmony, of understanding, a place where anyone could be welcome."
"Only if they come in the same spirit with which the place was founded," Remus said, meeting Malfoy’s gaze evenly. "Get out."
Malfoy lifted his chin and turned away, starting for the Floo fireplaces.
"Don’t," Remus hissed at Peri, catching her shoulders as she started to follow. "Not here, not now. You’ll find some way, this isn’t the end, but don’t do anything now."
Peri struggled for a second, then gave up the fight and sagged against him. "No," she moaned, still weakly trying to push him away. "No, I can’t let him win, I have to go after him..."
She breathed in deeply, and Remus’ familiar scent soaked deep into her and began to erode her barricades. It would be so easy to give in, to let him hold her, to go home with him tonight and forget everything that had happened between this and the last time Remus Lupin had held her in his arms...
"I can’t." She pulled away. "I can’t do this."
"What can’t you do?"
"I can’t let you do this to me. You don’t mean to, but..." Peri shut her eyes, then opened them again. "I’m not here for me," she said, hoping Remus could hear how much this hurt her to say. "That’s not the reason I came. If I was here for myself, I’d stay with you. But I’m here for someone else, and he’s in trouble. I have to help him."
"Peri, nothing is going to happen to Ray tonight," Remus said with careful calm. "Not even Lucius Malfoy would hurt a little boy who fell out of a tree earlier today, especially not his own son. He may well punish Ray, but I think he’ll wait to do it."
Peri shivered. "That’s only because you don’t know him like I do," she said. "He’ll see this as treason, Remus, as a betrayal. He’ll know that I haven’t been teaching Ray all the things he wanted me to—that I’ve been teaching him completely differently—and he’ll want to start ‘fixing’ it right away, this instant, now." Her every instinct impelled her to get up, to run, it was only her humanity that kept her in her seat. "If I don’t go to him tonight, right now, I’ll be too late. I might be too late already."
She met Remus’ eyes. The love in them nearly drove her to her knees. "We’ve waited this long," she said softly. "Please, just one more night. Then I’ll come to you, and I’ll never leave you again. I promise."
"You’re sure."
It was a statement, not a question, but Peri answered anyway. "I’m sure."
Remus nodded once, then got to his feet. "Come home soon," he said. "I’ll be waiting."
Peri kissed her fingertips and brushed them against his cheek, then sprinted towards the fireplaces.
I’m coming, Ray. Hold on. I’ll be there soon...
xXxXx
Hermione had caught up with Jump in the woods just in time to see a tall man who looked a lot like Ray use a wand to blast Jump away from him and across the clearing. Her next few memories were hazy, but involved a lot of screaming, charging at the man, and pain in the places where she’d collided with the ground when he’d thrown her aside.
She’d managed to get up once the man had left, to check Jump and Harry and see that they were both breathing, and to start to run for help, but before she’d gone more than a few feet, she heard footsteps running her way. "Here!" she screamed. "In here!"
Meghan was the first one to reach her, but Healer Black wasn’t far behind. She went first to Harry, checking him over with her wand. Meghan glanced at the boy cursorily before running to Jump, who lay where Malfoy’s wand blast had left him. Falling to her knees, she stared at him in horror. "He’s dying," she said in a voice filled with shock.
Hermione caught at the nearest tree to hold herself up. She couldn’t remember a day without Jump, the way she couldn’t remember one without Harry. What would her life be without her dog?
"And he’s...he’s..." Meghan’s silvery eyes widened, and Hermione blinked. It might be a trick of the tears she could feel coming, but her friend seemed to be glowing somehow...
"No!" Meghan shrieked. "I won’t let him!" She thrust her hands into Jump’s fur, and a blinding flash of blue light shook the clearing.
Healer Black was on her feet, running to her daughter’s side. Her wand was in her hand, and she was already rattling off incantations, but she stopped in mid-word. "Dear God," she breathed, staring at something only she could see. "It can’t be..."
"What?" Hermione demanded, suddenly furious. "Tell me!"
"Go and get Moony and Peri, Hermione," Healer Black said like a woman in a trance, moving around to Jump’s other side and kneeling across from Meghan. "Have them take care of Harry. He’s only been knocked out, he should wake up on his own. I have something I need to do."
She pressed her own hands down on top of Meghan’s, and a second, brighter, flash of blue filled the air. When it cleared, mother and daughter knelt motionless on either side of the brown-furred dog, their eyes closed and their faces frozen into identical expressions of determination.
Hermione backed away a few steps, then turned and ran.
Moony would know what to do.
xXxXx
So this is how it ends. Sixteen years as a slave to tradition, six or seven being more or less happy, then six more as a dog, and now this.
Sirius was rather proud of that summation of his life. It was short, poetic, and accurate, which was more than could be said for many biographies.
He flicked a pebble idly into the water by which he sat. Clear and salt-smelling, it lapped around his legs with each wave and seeped up his robes, making him shiver a little. He’d tried getting up once or twice, but dizziness had overcome him before he’d even got to his knees.
I guess I’m supposed to stay here.
The tide was coming in, he knew. The waves weren’t leaving him on dry ground when they rolled out anymore, and the last few high ones had wetted his chest. Before too long, he’d be sitting waist-deep in water. Then chest-deep, then shoulder, and then...
He shrugged. When he’d seen Malfoy bending over Harry that way, dog instinct had taken him. Anything threatening a young one of his pack had to be destroyed, even if there was a chance that he might not survive himself.
But that was truly a brilliant move, Sirius. You not only got yourself killed, but you didn’t do anything to Malfoy. You never even marked him. Now he’s got Harry, and he knows what Peri’s been doing all these years, so he’s got Ray as well, and if he wants Hermione he’ll take her too...
Sirius shut his eyes hard to try to fight those images. He knew what Lucius Malfoy was capable of. He’d lived through enough of it, those weeks before the Death Eaters had tired of him and thrown him out to live or die as a dog.
But there’s nothing I can do about it now. It’s over.
He shivered as a chill wind blew across him.
I wish I could have seen my daughter, just once. Little Meghan Lily. Looks like her mum, but has her dad’s eyes...
"Are you hurt," said a treble voice, "or are you just stupid?"
Author Notes:
I’d like to take this opportunity to state that the identities of Founders’ Heirs in side stories are not necessarily applicable to the main story. Thank you.