Wolf550e posted a comment on Saturday 1st May 2010 4:56am

insta-Soul Bonded and a telepathic link?

"Do animals have emotions?" and "So an animal could get in, but I don’t see..." and "That is it. That is the thought I was chasing." sounds like an exercise from a storybook for toddlers. "What sound does a cow make?" kind of stuff.

So far, the story has the same amount of connection with reality as a harem fic, it just caters to a different fantasy.

Wolf550e posted a comment on Saturday 1st May 2010 4:03am

Please publish an honest and comprehensive answer list to the Mary Sue Litmus Test, because currently you fail, completely and utterly. A sister of Hermione Granger who just happens to be old enough to marry Remus Lupin, and instead of dating and falling in love like normal people Fate makes them "soul bond" in a single day? And she is a muggle who miraculously cures his Lycantrophy, of all things convenient. I'll eat my hat if she doesn't look exactly like the author only cuter.

Wolf550e posted a comment on Saturday 1st May 2010 2:32am

Hermione's speech: Hermione is ten months older than Harry. Harry is 21 months old, so she is 31 months old. At two and a half, a gifted girl like Hermione would be speaking fluently in complex sentences, and possibly learning her letters.

Fiermancer posted a comment on Monday 22nd March 2010 2:29am

Yep, my first guesses were correct, I'm enjoying this a lot so far.

Fiermancer posted a comment on Monday 22nd March 2010 2:01am

I like it, first chapter has drawn me in, what in my experience is a good sign that I will enjoy the rest of the fic. I'm looking forward to reading the rest.

Paul Blay posted a comment on Monday 22nd February 2010 5:50am

Yeah. Using 'Marauder's Den' in the first place was a bad idea. Using it again was a REALLY bad idea.

KateHC posted a comment on Wednesday 27th January 2010 1:16am

Collinda recommended that I read all of your stories. I have certainly enjoyed Living with Danger.

Waywren Truesong posted a comment on Sunday 17th January 2010 4:25pm

...so I'll just leave little notes here and there. *huggles poor Remus* It's fun reading this from the end. XD

Taina posted a comment on Friday 9th October 2009 8:30pm

Ok so I just finished the entire story in like 5 hours. I forgot how wonderful, exciting and enticing it was. I'm off to the next one (again). Keep up the fantastic job.

Taina

Wiccan_Childe posted a comment on Wednesday 17th June 2009 10:27pm

LOL, I love this story so much.

Just wanted to ask if you've ever seen 'A Little Princess'? The bit with Meghan makes me think of it every time!

bookworm914 posted a comment on Saturday 16th May 2009 4:30pm

Normally I'm not much for poetry. But Aletha's song (lullaby? - i have a hard time thinking of it in a faster tempo than that, anyway) is positively the sweetest, most wonderful little rhyme, superlative in all good qualities.
From a previous chapter, the one in which Danger first tames Remus, and this is really the first and so far only thing that I've felt was a departure from character ie an unrealistic reaction to a situation, my feeling is that he should have taken longer to be comfortable with bringing Hermione into a room with a werewolf. I see it as a problem of omission. He has, obviously, a serious complex about his lycanthropy. Admittedly, not only would this make him careful about exposing people to the wolf but also eager to belief the best of the cure that seemed to be working. So I don't think it's necessarily unreasonable that he would have agreed to Hermione being brought into the house that night. But he is accustomed to thinking of his werewolf form as vicious and dangerous, so he would have needed to consciously consider the potential danger of the "taming" failing, and then decide it was safe for Hermione to be inside because Danger would be there all night touching him to restore the magic, or some such.
This story is awesome. Things that I particularly liked here were
- Danger asking if there was anything Aletha wanted broken: nothing about the way you said it in particular, but the character trait of calmly announcing rage and then expressing it is a really cool trait, and totally fitting both with the sort of person you're making Danger out to be, and with your style of omniscient narration.
- the "animal language": a lot of authors give lip service to the idea that animals communicate differently than people do, but then let the substance of those communications be exactly what it would be if the characters were human. Your method seems very reasonable, and you execute it well. At the same time though, I would have enjoyed seeing clear indications of what the physical signals are for all of these concepts, not just the first and last.
- the "all sleeping with each other to comfort Harry" idea is awesome. The out-of-the-box sort of thing that most people would never think of, and it's wonderful because it is the perfect solution to the problem they were confronting.
- the sentence "Because today is the day in between the two most illegal nights of my life." Effective to start the sentence with 'b/c', and the precision ('day b/w the 2 nights') of the description. Very well-put-together sentence.

bookworm914 posted a comment on Saturday 16th May 2009 1:18pm

The internal monologues are wonderful. The story flows quickly, but the switch between narration and monologue acts as a variation of pacing and tone, so it doesn't get dull the way straight narration does.
She makes him not a crazy werewolf - that's a much more important reading of that line from the prophecy.
This "share our complete set of memories while we sleep" bit is kind of far-fetched. I guess that's signed-up-for in reading fanfic of a magical world. But it rather cheapens the romance - they don't have to get to know each other, and we don't get to know them, before they can be hopelessly in love. But I suppose it's going to be useful by allowing the plot to move forward?

bookworm914 posted a comment on Saturday 16th May 2009 12:35pm

This is a killer of an opening.
Granger... the little girl is Hermione... ne-ne Neenie... ?
And Hermione has an older sister with... prophetic dreams? And far-sighted dreams? Wow.
I love the way you write this. Remus is just despondent in his internal monologue, which is so like him. And then he sees Harry and it's just autopilot to run to him and get involved with him again, so of course he's willing to talk with this girl. I believe all of it.
And this line in particular is really compelling - "Several loose parts of his world were starting to fall into place. Specifically, the "Sirius would never betray Lily and James" part, and the "Peter doesn’t strike me as the martyr type" part." The way you keep the language references constant I guess: you say that "parts" are coming together, so you refer to the particular belief-concepts as "parts". Very compelling and awesome.

That prophecy must be really confusing to them, but not quite so much to us: The first bit is the pairings for the story, H/G and R/Hr? (alack, I've become partial to H/Hr) The rat is obvious, and he's with the Weasley's, so that's "red"? Cat... McGonagall didn't believe the treachery? In PoA she was bewildered by it, but she did believe it just like everyone else... grim is obvious... "truth" is this aletha who's mentioned in the summary (that's cheating, oops) b/c aletha is really close to the Greek root for true, so they need her to help them rescue Sirius? "wolf that runs in brightest dark" is a full-moon wolf, werewolf, that's Remus, and that's a fabulous turn of phrase to describe him, "in danger" should read "in Danger" b/c 'danger' is the only word that could be referenced by 'she' in the subsequent lines... although it would also be really cool if that line meant something about actually ?conjuring? fires out "of" bravery rather than fear or some such... "his mind is whole" so he doesn't want to commit suicide anymore? I feel like "twine" could be used archaically to mean "two", unless that was a similar but other word, in which case it would enumerate "they" at the beginning of the line, but that would leave the sentence without a predicate. So "twine" means 'tie the knot', marry? Having saved Harry, they can marry him to... a muggleborn?... Hermione, perhaps? then the first couplet means something else... and yea, if they do it right then everyone lives happily ever after. Cool. This is like the way Shakespeare would open his plays with a quick plot summary so everyone would be able to follow along?

Tabitha Potter posted a comment on Sunday 12th April 2009 12:41am

This fic never fails to ake me laugh, cry and want to hug the creen. well written... PLEASE! update this the main story more often, I love your little side ones, but I really need to know what happens when it ends... DOES DRACO REALLY DIE!! tell me!

Madame Black posted a comment on Sunday 18th January 2009 1:24am

Very nicely done, enjoyed this very much and it kept me glued to the computer for nearly the whole day! Bow on to the sequels...:)

.tonimaree posted a comment on Sunday 28th December 2008 10:15pm

Reading this for a second time, whilst waiting for 'Facing Danger' to be updated, has opened my eyes to a few things.

One, i now get what the hell the prophecys are going on about,

And two, to how good of a writer, if just a fan fiction writer, (but most likely not) you are.

Keep up the good work, and i look forward to reading the rest of 'Facing Danger' in the near future.

from a delighted reader,

Toni Cernosa.

menentesa posted a comment on Friday 5th December 2008 4:13am

I have a question about this chapter. I've read this story several times (you're my favorite fanfic author by the way!) and I just noticed something about the date at the top.
I thought it said in one of the first chapters that Danger's parents died after Harry beat Voldemort, and that she started true-dreaming after that about Harry, etc.
I thought at that point she was dreaming of what had happened, not what was going to. So shouldn't they have died between November and March?
This is a very minor thing, and I love everything in the Dangerverse:) This is mostly just to satisfy my own curiosity :) Keep up the fantastic work!

Anne B. Walsh replied:

Remus assumes, when he first meets Danger, that her parents were killed by uncontrolled Death Eaters. They were actually killed before the war ended, and he finds that out later. Thanks for the review!

bookaholic_au posted a comment on Tuesday 25th November 2008 11:41pm

Its funny that you used that particular song. My high school has a spectacular carols night, where one of the teachers sings "O Holy Night" operatic style. Its rather odd superimposing my memory of Mrs ____ singing that on a petite redheaded seven year old.

bookaholic_au posted a comment on Monday 24th November 2008 7:58pm

I wonder if anyone has ever written the Weasley's as Catholics. It would be interesting. Your average Catholic parish (in Australia at least) consists of a disproportional number of Irish-blooded redheads, with a fancy for marrying other Irish people (my own family was in Australia for 150 years before marrying out of the Irish community). In addition, the Catholic church discourages the use of contraceptives, and while the rule is rarely followed, more Catholics have large families than other religions. I know girls from families of ten and twelve, and larger families of four and five are more common than in the wider community.

It would definately be an interesting experiment ...

Anne B. Walsh replied:

*laughs quite a lot* I'd have no trouble at all writing it, that's for sure! *has three siblings and attends Mass every week*

Rowling stayed away from discussing religion, so I'm doing the same, but I will certainly be looking into religions of several varieties in my original work. Thanks for the idea!

PrayingForMercy posted a comment on Tuesday 11th November 2008 4:44pm

Yaaaaaaaaaay!
:)